What do you do when you doubt yourself? Whatever the dream is, many of us doubt ourselves at some point. I always doubt myself. But, then, having been average in most things and never having really tried to push past my boundaries (for most of my life anyway), doubting is pretty natural.
One thing I’ve heard from everyone aspiring to become a writer (or author anyway as lately I’ve heard that if you can write then you’re a writer) is that they doubt themselves.
It seems to be a common trait even among the super famous continually best-selling authors.
“I WILL be published.”
This is what I tell people. Am I talking to them? Perhaps. Perhaps my eyes are directed at them and I’m answering their question. But are my words directed at them? Usually not.
I say this because I think if I say it enough times with enough force, my doubts will lessen. Maybe even go away.
Until my husband decided to give me his backing and support, I couldn’t even say I was a writer without feeling self-conscious. Inwardly I’d condemn myself as a liar and I knew that everyone knew it. Yes, despite writing all the time and working on a MS and getting some short stories published, I still could not in good conscience call myself a writer.
Perhaps this had somewhat to do with the looks people gave me which I interpreted as “Slacker. Get a real job.” Oddly enough, I got a lot of the same looks when I’d tell people I was a stay-at-home mom.
Or, even worse, excitement and the dreaded question, “What have you written?” Followed by disappointment and that previously mentioned look. By the way, I get the same look when I say I blog. Since I’m not all professional with my blogging I don’t call myself a blogger but I do consider this to be a part of my work.
These days my doubts are pretty minor because my husband is supporting me. He said he always expected me to get a job and make money but he noticed all the jobs I was able to get weren’t career jobs. This was a foreign concept for him. Why wasn’t I able to make a career out of anything? Why couldn’t I get better jobs?
The answer to that is pretty simple – the economy fizzled and the job market turned to stinky poop. Also, I wasn’t trained for career-type jobs and nobody would hire anyone without experience.
He concluded that what he considered normal career-type jobs weren’t appropriate for me. My passion lay with writing so I had better become a writer.
My Translation: You’re not cut out for other jobs so you’d better focus on this.
Ooookay! Works for me!
What do you say to quiet your doubts or do you let your doubts rage?